The year of birth influences one’s chances upon hiring, the ladies' success in front of male specimens (with gentlemen, the age is questionable in this respect) and the degree of wisdom of all (or so they say). The day of birth implies an even greater weight. It establishes the erotic destiny of the individuals themselves, who, in order to get often to bed or with whom they have to, depend on the luck written in the stars. This, besides the (often encountered) negotiation of the price.
According to the illumined minds, given the phenomenon in question, the situation is as follows (for both men and women):
1-Those who came to the world on the first day of the month are readily aroused. And they come back to their senses fast enough. Provided they consume urgently, satisfactorily and relatively inexpensively their inner thrill.
2-They are patient and do not interfere with anyone. Before investing money in a relationship (or, in the romantic cases, their feelings), they want to feel deeply attracted to the being they set their eyes upon. Otherwise they do not make the slightest effort, moving neither a finger, nor any other important part of the body.
3-They are used to making unconventional choices, being sure of themselves regardless of context. They do so even when the partner steals the wallet from under their nose, and they remain immobilized with cuffs by the edge of the bed.
4-They are characterized by the restive passion as well as by the desire to be taken by surprise. They are among the few who do not suffer a nervous breakdown when the partner for a night confesses after a tiresome round, that he/she has undergone multiple surgery episodes (including one of sex change).
5-They hate loneliness and have a lot of “love” to share with others around them. And this, even when the ones around them reveal their refusal. But these examples already pertain to the area of pathological.
6-They like steadiness and regard flying from flower to bloom as an action to be avoided on the long-term. They prefer to be loyal to the same people, no matter what the exclusiveness would cost them. In euro, rupees or dollars.
7-People favoring deeds over words, those born on day 7, hate to verbalise their feelings. In other words, the girls exclaim very rarely: “Ah, my dear, how good it was!”, while the boys astutely refrain from comments potentially damaging their physical integrity, such as: “it would suit you wonderfully if you lost weight a little!”.
8-Old-fashioned passionate people, they tend to leave guard down to the lovers and/or mistresses, risking to choose a new room-mate (a new he or she) in the apartment after only a few devastating inward encounters.
9-Marked by idealistic stories, these people try to reconstitute, in all the characters of the opposite sex, the image (and body) of the first love. Their thorough searches often result in syphilis, gonorrhea, or genital parasites. Problems related to the ruining of the emotional state or the personal bank account are not excluded, either.
10-They are skeptical and reserved about embracing stable, but extremely open relationships in testing everything that relates to the instinctual side of life (referring to the bedroom, naturally)... because public urination, relocation to caverns or other similar human instinctual manifestations, do not tempt them at all.
11-They relish slowness. At work, in the street and in the bed he/she moves at his/her own pace, frequently comparable to that of a snail tired and ill from liver disease, existential disdain and gonarthritis. They must carefully organize their agenda in order not to be late at work because of slow-moving preludes performed.
12-Tough on the outside and gentle on the inside, the people born on day 12, seem like unwavering rocks in front of the waves of emotion, weakness or feelings of all kind. In fact, the duplicitous conceal a few doses of sweaty pseudo-romanticism, likely to come to light (unfortunately) exactly at the most inappropriate moments. Easy to be deduced which ones...
13-They are a little pretentious about the aspect of their partners, so what fascinates them, in the end, proves to be the price. Isn’t that the way it should be in any transaction that is concluded?
14-Alhough they seem the kind of people who are unconstrained by the suffering of the Third World (or of the white whales), who have sex while negotiating business and commissions on the phone, appearances deceive: their little hearts host intense passions, ready to burst up just above... to the ceiling.
15-They react/resonate with difficulty to the changes and come back, every time, to the being responsible for the most gruesome orgasms in the history of their escapades.
16-Addicted adherents of action, these persons refuse to indulge in sweets discourses aimed at sensitizing the audience in pants. The exception is given by role-plays and ridiculizing of some ex-lovers (male or female) amateurs of sweet nothingness.
17-Complex souls, which oscillate between periods of erotic asceticism and unleashed sessions with multiple orgasmic endings, those born on the 17th of the month, like to experience endlessly, anyhow and with anyone.
18-They tend to develop obsessions about the one who conveys them a strong impression. They always turn back to their favourite “memories”, despite the restrictions received.
19-They draw their energy from sparkly interaction with various people (and strangers, if possible), requiring day by day challenges and “inspiration”. Sometimes they get exhausted from overdoses... of whatever nature they might be.
20-They suffer from the mania of supreme perfection and declare themselves all the time dissatisfied with what intuition related to love-making is offering them. It often happens for them to regret the choice of a particular partner, but not the action itself.
21-They consider themselves divine in the bedroom, whether they are doing their head alone, with the partner or in an extended formula of the... extravagant orgy type. Although deeply impressed by personal performance, reality does not always give them justice.
22-They hunt for the suspense in any adventure. This does not mean, however, that they are pleased to be left bewildered by a fare for the payment of which it would be necessary to sell a kidney or by the idea of discovering a different sex than the one foreseen under the clothing that would not have entitled them to susceptibility.
23-They throw themselves unconsciously into the bed of the persons available with or without payment. Boldness brings great joy to their hearts. In unfortunate cases, she causes a hole in the wallet and at least two... three... venereal diseases.
24-They are keen to socialize intensely by all means before moving on to “business”. They get to orgasm with difficulty if they do not know the size of the shoes or what places the characters, they accept in their privacy visited during their childhood.
25-They blame themselves in front of all, they are insecure and they are afraid of the possible negative reactions of those who are close to them. Often times, they manage to save the situation with a demand to be severely punished for their weaknesses. With a slap on the bottom, a nipple bite or a “dirty” insult...
26-They run away from the empty bed like the vampires from light. They have so much love to offer that they spend their last penny to bang their “fire” into the world.
27-They assign special significance to each meeting. Psychologists would say that strict evidence of ideas forged and their assessment according to their own criteria indicates insecurity and self-control problems. Not in the case of men. They operate frequently with such lists...
28-The person is the victim of adrenaline caused by the unknown. Especially when the unknown is hiding in a huge penis or in the voluptuous forms of a mysterious diva.
29-The person is breaking down limits when it comes to love-making. The only thing that diminishes their “stunt” is the husband or wife.
30-They get bored quickly and change the registry as they change the lingerie. Now he/she is bothered by a slap on the ass, the next day they love it. Yes, even without being bipolar.
31-They are passionate about everything they do and they consume themselves up to exhaustion. Literally!