A little about BDSM

A little about BDSM

A little about BDSM

“Do not judge a book by its cover.”
(Anonymous)

The historical origins of BDSM are obscure and lost somewhere very deep... in the mists of time. A first mention of such practices comes precisely from the ninth century BC, regarding certain rituals of flogging in Artemis Orthia, one of the most important areas of ancient Sparta. There, these habits called “diamastigosis” were practiced regularly.

The oldest evidence of graphics though, related to sadomasochistic activities was found in a tomb in Tarquinia (Italy).

Various other evidence of BDSM practices, as a substitute for sex or integrally part of it, are mentioned by historians in various stages more or less distant in history.

Kama Sutra describes methods of impact that can be applied during intercourse, but also allowed areas to produce different kinds of pleasure. These texts on atypical erotic experience, explicitly outline that games played during sexual activity should be performed exclusively consensual, because not all men and especially not all women perceive such attempts as a novel factor, exciting or giver of pleasure.

From this perspective the Kama Sutra can be considered one of the earliest writings that deal with sadomasochistic activities and safety rules specific to BDSM practices.

Some historians argue that a precursor of this field can also be found in the behaviour of medieval knights who showed their love and obedience in ways quite similar to “unconventional” erotic practices from today.

Others argue that BDSM was individualized and catalogued in the early 18th century, when Western civilization began to define sexuality, including medically.

Currently, BDSM is practiced around the world, in almost all countries where there are profile communities or clubs. The exact number of followers is not known yet, but it would otherwise be very difficult to estimate such a figure, as most choose to conduct such activities in a completely private environment.

There is not a certain social category prone to sexual habits of BDSM area. Men and women from all backgrounds and levels of society are equally curious to be bound, constrained or dominating their partner through various perverse actions.

Generally, the term BDSM can be divided into three areas or six acts :
-B & D - Bondage and Discipline;
-D & S - Dominance and Submission;
-S & M - Sadism and Masochism.

Bondage. The definition of bondage means the own or other people’s physical restraint, of course in a consensual way and using proper equipment.

In general, people turn to easy bondage, sometimes without realizing it. For example, the famous plush or furry handcuffs which to be honest... almost all of us adore or we at least once had fantasies about them.

The main reason for which bondage is among the most popular BDSM practices is that the action itself gives to one of the partners (to the passive one), that exciting feeling of constraint or powerlessness, and to the other, the pleasure to dominate, to have fully control and to fulfill his/her wishes without encountering any opposition.

Other people simply love the feeling of being blindfolded... savoring the moments of “surprise” and unknown. Not for the one that offers the “surprises” is not less pleasant, as he/she has the feeling of total freedom, with the certainty whatever gestures she/he might take, they will not be seen and so... he/she will not be judged or misjudged.

Last but not least, bondage is excellent to stimulate trust between partners, teaching them how to enjoy what they are to receive or to give.

Discipline. Erotic practice embodied by requiring a submissive to listen and execute everything that the dominant one orders, the latter ensuring that he/she owns and maintains control through rules and punishments. Something like that would be a brief definition of discipline in erotic games.

In essence, the act of discipline has a relatively simple scenario. It occurs when the submitted one requires a coercive treatment due to a conduct improper to the agreed scenario (ie following the infringement of certain predetermined rules). These rules are established before any session, being mutually agreed upon by both parties. The rules are simple: “You can not smoke!” or very strict: “You... you will not have an orgasm!”.

If you are new to BDSM techniques, you can try a simple game of Role Play. For example, baing a “teacher” (with the mission to supervise homework), you offer to your student a lesson of discipline, each time when she accidentally looks your intimate part of the body, through some few light blows on the butt with special articles specific for spanking... a paddle, a riding rod or why not even a whip.

If you want to get involved some more, punishments can develop towards the mental and emotional side through humiliation and verbal “flogging”.

Of course, all this is done ONLY with your partner’s approval.

Domination. A range of behaviours, customs and rituals that allow exercise of control and power over another person.

You may not even realize, but in most relationships there is always a “dominant” partner and a “submissive” one, even if the relationship or sex itself, has nothing to do with BDSM.

Many love to practice their submissive side in their bedroom, considering the discipline and bondage as exciting ways to be controlled. A very good way to get into the role of a dominator is to dress in different linen or leather, PVC or latex costumes. Thus, it creates a kind of authority at a visual level, a relatively aggressive posture very attractive, nasty and sexy. You could also enjoy the control of pleasure or of “sublime” the moment (orgasm) using start-stop technique, until you decide it's time for “final” moment.

You can adopt including scenarios in which you can walk clients (inside your location) by the collar or leash on their neck or constrain them to fulfill certain household activities (cleaning, order in things, etc.).

Submission. Submission expresses the state of compliance occurred after domination.

Domination and submission go hand in hand. Submissive applicants will have to fulfill exactly what you want or... they risk being disciplined or punished.

You can choose to apply a gag (which will prevent the subjects to speak and can only remove exciting moans), also handcuffs and various bondage accessories for the hands and ankles (which will prevent the submissives to touch them or you), or of course, an eye mask (it will stop them to see you).

Sharing power is very satisfying both from sexual and emotional point of view.

Many BDSM escorts extend “obedience”, leaving it to become part of submissive clients’ lifestyle (the faithful ones), taking the role of “key holder” of their chastity belt.

Sadism. Obtaining sexual satisfaction causing pain to others.

Sadism is often considered a bad word, unusual or inconsistent with moral norms, just because of connotations specific to corrupt or anti-social characters. Over time, however, sadism and masochism as abstract notions, have been embodied in the BDSM philosophy and metamorphosed into a concept opposed to this obscure image.

If you manifest a sadic behaviour, this should always be consensual (only with the consent of the partners), understanding thereby that your attitude has to provide sexual pleasure (compulsorily), including to customers.

Masochism. Obtaining sexual satisfaction by tolerating pain.

Basically, masochism is the opposite of sadism. Proponents of this practice love to feel pain, be it by provoking it themselves or by receiving it from a dominant partner.

Many masochists love to experience pain because its presence, force the brain to release a significant amount of endorphins, creating a sense of sexual satisfaction (sometimes even orgasm) and a positive mood, extremely pleasant... a kind of “natural drug”. Also, some practitioners said that after flogging and humiliation sessions, besides erotic pleasure, finally, they feel very relaxed and relieved by the stress or tension accumulated in everyday life.

Sexual pleasure is often obtained through “torture” of genital organs, because this sensation is unique and intense.

Safety FIRST!!! The most important thing to keep in mind in the practice of BDSM activities is that everything you do has to be consensual and safe.

We offer you some tips that can ensure you to get the best results in your perverse activities and games:

-Make sure you always have a safe word or gesture that you can call to cease any action if both you and your clients feel that the situation gets out of control or what is happening is too much.

-If your customers are not interested in such practices do not insist. BDSM can be performed only if both partners express their consent in this regard and feel comfortable in these circumstances.

-When more people are involved, make sure that everyone understood every detail of the scenario that it is about to be operated. Situations in which the action takes place in a group, can become “scary”, even when everyone knows exactly what to do!

-Discuss about rules and limits before any session.

-Do not use (both you and your partners) alcohol or analgesics during these games. Body's ability to receive pain can be reduced and thus limits can be overcame involuntary beyond normality, existing the possibility of injury or hurting.